The United States of Abuse

Bandy X. Lee
7 min readSep 27, 2024

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How Long will We Condone Family Court Sacrifice of Our Children?

I was first alarmed when I served as an expert witness for a Family Court case in the Midwest, and a beautiful, sensitive four-year-old girl was allowed to be brutalized by her sexually assaultive father. There were four medical professionals confirming sexual assault and rape, and finally a rape kit returned positive. Yet, Child Protective Services (CPS) called this “insufficient evidence”! Instead, the stronger the evidence, both Family Court and CPS came down harder on the mother, until she lost custody altogether. The child — now permanently “sold” to a depraved and perverted man as a sexual slave — is as good as “soul murdered,” to use Leonard Shengold’s phrase. This would become the first of 39 out of the 40 Family Court cases in which I served as a expert witness, where the results would be as predictable as identical: the violent abuser gets sole custody, and the nurturing parent loses all contact by the time Family Court is through with the case. Every one of these cases, if in criminal court and not in the secret, Star Chambers of “sealed” Family Court, the child predator would have been convicted “beyond a reasonable doubt.”

Soul murder is worse than bodily murder, my patient population — violent offenders in maximum-security prisons — tell me. They mutilate themselves to lessen the pain, as they call themselves, “walking tombs.” Now, having set foot in the Family Courts (not an easy task), I am witnessing this damaged population in formation, a third of whom will become violent themselves to cope with the trauma they have endured. In the above case, Family Court had the choice to allow the girl to continue to thrive and blossom under her mother, as she had despite the abuse. Instead, it made the deliberate choice to consign the child to a “living hell,” or to unspeakable suffering and a life worse than death — and this is what Family Courts do to 160 children a day in this United States of Abuse. The reason? I am told that this is the biggest revenue source for the 50- to 175-billion-dollar Family Court industry. What I see in the actual courtrooms is a perpetrator class in black robes.

Now there are concrete studies showing that Family Court judges intend this destruction of children. A study from the University of Manchester aptly calls it, “‘Let’s excuse abusive men from abusing and enable sexual abuse’: Child sexual abuse investigations in England’s private family courts” (the U.K. government recently forced Family Courts to open to reporters and researchers, which is why we are hearing more from that side of the Atlantic, even though the U.S. invented the approach). However, this what I see every day. Below is another, clear-cut case whose evidence I personally examined as an expert witness. In addition to listening to the mother’s very credible interview, I encourage the reader to read more about her here, here, and here. Her reports are very valuable and rare, since Family Courts get away with what they do by destroying witnesses and silencing reporters.

Family Court-persecuted parents are almost always good if not excellent parents, but Ria Aichour is one of the best I have observed. Her loving relationship with her daughter is what allowed her daughter to become so precociously discerning, articulate, and outspoken — in other words, highly emotionally-developed — which is precisely what psychopathic predators, be they parents or judges, target for destruction:

NJ Mother Takes DCPP to Court Over Abuse Cover-Up

Sep 18, 2024

SIGN THE JUSTICE FOR M.C. PETITION

By Richard Luthmann

Ria Aichour, a New Jersey mother, continues her legal battle against the Division of Child Protection and Permanency (DCPP), alleging they failed to protect her daughter, M.C., from repeated sexual and physical abuse by M.C.’s biological father, Jimmy Cerveaux.

Ria Aichour

In a recent episode of The Unknown Podcast with journalists Michael Volpe and Richard Luthmann, Aichour detailed her harrowing experience of fighting to save her daughter from what she describes as DCPP’s systemic failures and cover-ups.

Jill Jones Soderman, Founder and Director of the Foundation for the Child Victims of the Family Courts, joined her.

Medical Concerns Lead to First Disclosure

According to Aichour, her daughter first disclosed the abuse in early 2023 during a doctor’s visit.

“We were on our way to the pediatrician when M.C. told me about the abuse,” she explained on the podcast.

The pediatrician made the initial report to DCPP, setting off a chain of events leading to Aichour’s legal nightmare.

DCPP conducted interviews with M.C., but according to their findings, the child didn’t disclose any abuse during those sessions.

However, Aichour, who wasn’t present for the interviews, said she installed cameras in her home after being told she was the only one hearing the disclosures. Despite alarming behavior from M.C., including sexualized play and repeated verbal disclosures, DCPP declined to view the video evidence.

18 Months of Ignored Disclosures

Aichour explained that over the next 18 months, M.C. disclosed the abuse to over 15 different individuals, including teachers, doctors, and other mandated reporters.

“At this point, 12 different people had called DCPP or the police, reporting that M.C. had disclosed abuse to them,” she said.

Despite these reports, DCPP repeatedly deemed the allegations “unfounded.”

Richard Luthmann, a former attorney and co-host of the podcast, pointed out the pattern of denial in cases like Aichour’s.

“Too many coincidences make a fact,” Luthmann said. “When you have 17 reports from multiple teachers and doctors over a year, it’s almost better than direct evidence.”

Doctors Raise the Alarm

Several doctors who examined M.C. became increasingly concerned. Forensic psychiatrist Dr. Bandy Lee was one of the professionals who found the disclosures credible.

“She made very clear, unequivocal disclosures to Dr. Lee and other doctors,” Aichour said.

Michael Volpe emphasized the importance of medical professionals’ reports.

“Doctors are trained to distinguish between coached children and those disclosing actual abuse,” he said. “If multiple doctors are calling it in, they believe the child is being abused.”

Yet despite these mounting concerns, DCPP maintained its stance, refusing to investigate further or view the evidence provided by Aichour.

“They didn’t want to see the videos. They didn’t want to acknowledge what M.C. was saying,” Aichour recalled.

Systemic Failures and Allegations of Cover-Up

The pattern of inaction has led Aichour to file a tort claim against DCPP and Hudson County, accusing them of gross negligence and a deliberate cover-up of her daughter’s abuse.

Luthmann described the situation as beyond negligence, saying, “It’s deliberate indifference, if not intentional.”

Jill Jones Soderman, another podcast guest and founder of the Foundation for Child Victims of the Family Court, elaborated on the systemic issues at play.

“This isn’t an isolated case,” she said. “Millions of children are being tortured and abused, and the systems in place are failing to protect them. The consequences are devastating.”

Jones Soderman went further, stating that reunification therapy, often mandated in cases like Aichour’s, is a form of psychological torture for the child.

“It tells children that what they experienced didn’t happen, gaslighting them into silence,” she said.

Struggling for Custody

While Aichour fights to protect M.C. legally, she also struggles in the family courts. Despite the evidence of abuse, M.C. was removed from Aichour’s custody and placed with her father, Jimmy Cerveaux.

“DCPP took her from me even after M.C. disclosed severe physical abuse, including strangulation,” Aichour said.

She hasn’t seen her daughter in three months and fears that without action, she may never regain custody.

“Every day that passes, I don’t know what’s happening to her,” Aichour tearfully shared on the podcast. “I count every single day — 92 days now.”

Mandated Reporter’s Dilemma

Adding to Aichour’s frustrations is her role as a mandated reporter. In New Jersey, individuals who suspect child abuse must report it or face criminal penalties. However, Aichour says she is caught in a bureaucratic nightmare.

“I’ve reported the abuse to the authorities, but they’re the ones allowing it to happen. Who do I report them to?” she asked.

When she went to the police, the response was equally frustrating.

“They told me to report it to DCPP — the very agency I’m accusing of negligence,” she said. “It’s a Kafkaesque situation. I’m damned if I do, and damned if I don’t.”

Legal and Advocacy Fight Continues

Despite the obstacles, Aichour is determined to continue her fight. She has filed a petition to urge the judge in her case to return M.C. to her custody and compel DCPP to act in her daughter’s best interest.

“This isn’t just about me and my daughter,” Aichour said. “It’s about ensuring that no other child goes through what M.C. is enduring.”

Richard Luthmann vowed to keep covering the case.

“This isn’t over,” he said. “We will continue to shine a light on this story until justice is served.”

As Aichour’s legal battles continue, she remains hopeful but realistic.

“The system has failed M.C.,” she said. “But I won’t stop fighting for her.”

SIGN THE JUSTICE FOR M.C. PETITION

(The original article is published here: https://substack.com/@luthmann/p-149037410.)

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Bandy X. Lee
Bandy X. Lee

Written by Bandy X. Lee

Forensic psychiatrist, violence expert, president of the World Mental Health Coalition (worldmhc.org), and New York Times bestselling author.

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